Archive for August, 2012

Confidence vs. Confusion

Thursday, August 30th, 2012

Carrie was utterly confused and disheartened when her doctor, the one in whom she had utmost confidence, told her he didn’t think she could have her own child.

Confident – “with fidelity”  To have trust or assurance.

Confusion – “with fusion”   To mingle together. A state of bewilderment or lack of clarity.

In any uncertain journey, the mind looks for something to trust; something worthy of assurance. This is confidence. This state of having fidelity, however, has more to do with what can be counted on without fail – something worthy of fidelity. Confusion, on the other hand, means that we have fused ourselves to something that is not worthy of our fidelity. We have lost ourselves in that which changes, leaving us feeling lost.

With confidence there is clarity. With confusion there is bewilderment.

On the fertility journey, there is no more uncomfortable place than feeling lost and confused. When we have bonded ourselves to the changeable; linked our hope to something which is uncertain, there is an innate sense of something being wrong; something feeling uncertain. Feelings of doubt arise, like “maybe this is the wrong course of action.”

So, what is worthy of fidelity? Can you trust a certainty in a particular course of action? Can you trust, with absolute, unfailing certainty, an individual doctor or clinic? Can you have 100 % trust and assurance that things will turn out the way you envision in your mind? No, No, and No. You cannot trust that which is untrustworthy. Every single person, place, thing, and situation, because it is changeable and fallible, has the potential for letting you down, and your heart knows it. You cannot trust anything without. The Tao te Ching reminds us that The Movement of the Tao is return.

Chinese medicine is based upon the premise: All diseases arise from the heart. Therefore, all cures come from the heart. Any state without ease means we are not right with the heart, which houses the spirit. We have placed our reliance on the changeable. We will, therefore, feel confused.

Because there is an inherent longing for something that we can count on with assurance, the mind will look outside for what it can count on. Again and again, external seeking will fail. Until we find that which is infallible, to which we can pledge our undying loyalty, we remain lost and confused. The only answer, the only true resting place is within the heart, which carries the spirit, our true self.

I tell stories of women, previously lost on the fertility journey, who have found this place of fidelity within and trust it completely. They remove their assurance from others. They remove their shaky reliance on doctors, their well meaning partners, family and friends, and lastly from the fallibility of the changing mind. They trust their hearts, the source of love, the source from which the desire to bring forth life arises. And always, always, it proves worthy of fidelity.  Perhaps, right now, in the midst of whatever confusion you may be experiencing, the spirit of your future child is leading you to a place of inner fidelity.

Holding Your Dream

Tuesday, August 14th, 2012

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all
-Emily Dickinson

When your dream hasn’t become a reality, do you continue to pursue it, or do you let it go? Many people I have worked with over the years have great difficulty relating to their dream when it remains elusive. Some continue to hold it tightly, and pursue it with everything they have; others let it slip away, little by little, until there is nothing left but despair.

A dream, a goal, a vision pursued, is a function of the right brain, governed by the Liver system of energies, according to Chinese medicine. We create an image in our mind’s eye, and muster up the energy and resources to pursue it. The desire often becomes a reality. But not always. Difficulty arises when we hold tightly to desire and don’t let it go. Most liver qi stagnation is caused by the resistance to unfulfilled desires.
Look back over your life and recall all of the desires you have had. Have they all become a reality? Not mine. When I was ten, I wanted to live on a ranch in Montana with my husband and three kids and be a roller skating waitress at a drive-in. When I was a teenager, I wanted to spend the rest of my life with my first boyfriend. When I started college, I decided to major in journalism. None of these deeply held dreams came to fruition, but that doesn’t mean they were wrong.  Life molded itself so that my life could fulfill its destiny; not so I would get all that I wanted in the way I wanted it.

When life doesn’t participate with you according to the way you are holding your dream, perhaps you need to hold it differently. Perhaps the thing with feathers that is perched in the soul is molding you, rather than the other way around.

Don’t give it words; don’t give it an image. Let it provide one for you. Open your heart to allow hope to speak in its own language. My longing for children was not a mistake, but the way I pursued it was. I thought I could make it happen according to my timeline, in my way. My children came in their own way. The dreams I held in my heart guided me – I didn’t guide them. My children didn’t come because of my desire or what I did with it. True desires are unselfish and emerge from the heart – the same place through which our fertility comes forth.

Hold the feeling of the dream in your heart. Let it sing its wordless tune through your heart and guide you to its fruition.

Fertility Supplement Call Series

Monday, August 6th, 2012

Join us for our most informative conference call series, as Dr. Lewis reveals the most important supplements for specific fertility related cases.  A not-to-be missed series that will answer your questions and leave you confident with your vitamin choices.

Conference Call schedule:

General Nutritional Supplementation for Fertility and Ovarian Health:

August 8th at 8 p.m. EST

Endometriosis Supplementation:

August 12th at 2 p.m. EST

PCOS & Sugar Metabolism:

August 19th at 2 p.m. EST

Call-In Instructions:

To join in dial 605-475-4000 then access code 794774#. Those calling from Canada should call 805-360-1075 and then you will be prompted to enter the original number and access code.

1. Please DON’T announce your name when you dial in – there will be many callers on the line and the conference call may have already begun.

2. Immediately press *6 to MUTE your phone line (or use the Mute button on your phone) – this will prevent any unnecessary background noise and static on the line. You can press *6 to unmute your line once the call is opened up for discussion.

3. There are only 100 callers allowed on the call – make sure to call-in early to reserve your space.

4. Please keep topics and questions during the discussion related to the specific call.

Red Thread

Wednesday, August 1st, 2012

There is an ancient Chinese legend about the red thread of destiny. In the midst of the chaos of life, and seemingly random events, according to myth, the gods tie an invisible red thread around the ankles of those that are destined to meet each other in a certain situation or help each other in a certain way. They might become lovers or partners; they might work together or become lifelong friends. One might help another to open their life in miraculous ways. But we can be sure, there is no mistake in our meeting.

The further on in life we go, the less random it seems. We can recognize the interconnectedness of everything. We see that even in the midst of overwhelm, there are certain patterns to the workings of life. These patterns are easy to recognize in nature – predictable changes in seasons, weather patterns, growth and life cycles, the way flowers bloom in predictable ways, the perfect spiral of a sea shell…

Eight days after the eighth full moon of each year, the coral reefs spawn throughout the seas, beginning the predictable but hidden renewal of ocean life. The entire universe runs by the laws of nature. So do you.

Have you ever met someone and immediately recognized each other as if you had always known each other? Red thread.

Have you ever felt like your whole world was falling apart, like everything you cherished and held dear was crumbling, but didn’t know why or what was on the horizon? A few months or years later, it was clear how destiny was unfolding perfectly. As the old pattern was being destroyed, a new pattern was emerging. More red thread action.

It’s hard to fathom that we are not controlling every aspect of our lives. We tend to get stuck in our beliefs about the way it’s all “supposed to be.” And we lose sight of the fact that it is always working for our highest good. We reach out for something that is within.

Your life up to this point has not gotten off track. You haven’t waited too long, missed the right opportunity, or messed up your destiny in any way. The longing for a child is even divinely given. Here is a test: just see if you can get rid of it. If you were in charge of your destiny, you would either be able to manifest a child, or annihilate the desire. You can’t do either. It is being done. You can, however, let go into the miraculous flow of life itself so that it may happen.

A woman I recently worked with, now pregnant, told me that every moment of her life seemed to bring her to the point where this miracle could occur. Every setback, every doctor’s negative diagnosis, every high FSH reading, every sleepless night, was not a mistake. It proved to her that the faith in her heart was stronger than any external circumstance. Red thread.